Paul Bischke (1958-2007)

Posted on Jul 8th, 2007 by

Jon

Paul2

On June 29th my Uncle and dear friend Paul Bischke passed away. Paul had struggled with a long battle with depression. It was a battle that unfortunately he was not able to win. I'm going to miss Paul in ways that I'm sure I don't even fully realize now. And I'm never going to forget what a special man he was or how much he influenced me in my life.

Paul was one of a kind. At his reviewal service someone described him as a "Renaissance Man" and I think that's about the best label you could put on Paul (not that I'm a big believer in labels). I think there are very few people on the planet who had such a diverse range of passions as Paul did. Here are just a few examples:

Jazz piano - Paul had a gift for music. He could sit down at the piano and just play. No lessons, no sheet music. Just his ears, his fingers and his creativity. Every holiday he'd play for us. The silence next Christmas without him being there to play will be eerie.

Drug policy reform - Paul had a HUGE heart. I don't remember the exact story but when he was younger one of his friends went through a terrible disease that caused a lot of pain and wasn't able to get access to medical marijuana to relieve the suffering. This caused Paul to go on a crusade for drug policy reform. He wrote editorials that were picked up by national newspapers like the USA Today and Washington Post. He fought an uphill battle with this but it was one he passionately believed in.

Organic farming - Paul was also incredibly sensitive to the damage caused by much of the conventional farming industry. He had a vision to grow organic crops on our family farm in North Dakota. For a long time this revolved around an herb called echinacea that he grew and made tinctures from and even a chocolate/echinacea combo that was, as far as I know, the first product of its kind in the world.

Focusing - Paul was an advocate of a therapy technique called Focusing (similar to Kabat-Zinn's Mindfulness Meditation stuff if you're familiar). He often went on Focusing retreats and even went so far as to put together a grant proposal for a new form of rehabilitation for abusive individuals that had Focusing techniques at its heart. Someday someone will ultimately carry that program out with great success (based on everything I heard about its efficacy from Paul).

And that's only a partial list. i could go on and on.

But the one thing that I'll ultimately remember most about Paul was his integrity. Paul had very clear feelings on what was wrong and was right about our world. And he had no interest in ever compromising his beliefs for a cheap dollar or to make someone feel more comfortable. On one hand he had a tremendous amount of respect for others and tolerance for their views. On the other hand he'd never say something that betrayed how he really felt. I'm not quite sure how he pulled that off with such elegance and grace. It's a skill that I only hope to master like he did at some point in the future.

So yeah, it's been a tough week for me. A week ago I was enjoying the most pristine day on the beach here in Los Angeles. Minutes later my world was rocked by the most shocking news I've ever received in my life. One minute Paul was here. The next he was gone. It still doesn't seem real.

But life does go on. And as I told someone in the days after I learned of Paul's death, a lot of what I do the rest of my life will be dedicated to Paul. His spirit of idealism and his desire to see the world improved will be things that will eternally inspire me. To carry on his legacy is the best way I know to honor his life.

And I'd be remiss if I didn't add that I think one of the things that I will carry with me is the desire to share with people that depression indeed is serious shit. I don't pretend to understand and I definitely know that the ways that we're currently treating it probably aren't anywhere near optimal. I'd love to see just a little bit of that money we're spending over in Iraq diverted to researching it more. That'd be nice...

But without going on too much of a rant I'll say that if you know people who are suffering from depression or who you think might be then do whatever you can to support them. See that they get proper treatment. That they eat healthy and exercise (everything matters). And most importantly, that they know they are loved. I'd give anything to be able to tell Paul that one more time.

Last Tuesday I was packing to head back to Minneapolis for the funeral and decided to put on some Thelonious Monk music. Paul was a huge fan of his. Monk's music spoke to his soul. Right now I'd like to think that maybe Paul is chilling with The Man himself, playing the piano and competely lit up with joy and entirely free from what troubled him here on Earth these last few months. And to be honest, given how brilliant Paul was he'd probably teach him a thing or two about how to play :)

Rest in peace Paul. I love you and will miss you.